Fapware Policies

Establishing the Ground Rules

Overview:

Fapware.com is owned and operated by Elporia, Inc.

The full range of Policies that govern the use of the Fapware.com website; contacting or posting comments and replies; purchasing products from The Treasure Chest Shop; and sharing content can be found at Elporia.net.

For you own protection, we recommend that you take the time to read through these documents, particularly the ones that govern your use of this website.

You can find a link to individual polices in the Footer section, located (for your convenience) at the bottom of each webpage.

Below, are a list of policy exceptions that apply directly to your use of this website.

If you do NOT agree to these terms and conditions, please contact us to let us know what the issue is or if you prefer, leave the site.

However, before you go, we would like to learn what the source of your displeasure may be in order to give us an opportunity to clarify any misunderstandings or if need be, revise and update our policies to address your concerns.

To see the complete list of policies that govern the operation and use of Fapware.com, please visit the Policies page at Elporia.net.

 

Privacy:

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You’ve heard it all before:

 

We value your privacy.

 

In fact, you’ve heard and read it so many times, it no longer has any meaning.

Just another hackneyed and tired bromide that sounds good on paper, but means little in practice.

Except in the case of Fapware.com.

And to prove we do in fact “value your privacy,” besides discreet packaging and using Elporia, Inc. (instead of Fapware.com) as our shipping address, we don’t permit any pernicious or in-your-face advertising on our website and our use of cookies is limited to site performance metrics. After all, the ad-tech and gamification guys are the biggest offenders, tracking you on and offline, with or (more often than not) without your explicit consent, using obfuscated and hard to find, opt-outs instead of opt-ins.

We do not engage in that kind of anti-consumer behavior on Fapware.com. If want something from you, we’ll ask. In fact, if you take a minute to read Fappaholics Anonymous, a tongue-in-check description of our Rewards Program, you’ll get a better idea of where we are coming from and why.

With that said, please consult our full Privacy Policy to learn how we handle your data and what steps you can take to lodge a complaint or seek redress.

Finally, please note: we never send unsolicited information, unless given permission to do so.

 

Returns:

When it comes to handling returns on items such as sex toys, it’s tricky. You might say, it’s equivalent to being between a rock and a hard place. On the one hand, we want to do everything within our power to ensure customer satisfaction. OTOH, given the need to preserve high standards regarding personal hygiene, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to understand why we can’t take products—you don’t like or want—back. Therefore, we strongly urge you to choose carefully and read all of the reviews before making a final selection.

For our part, we will do our damnedest to make sure you are able to make an informed decision.

As a general rule, our policy regarding returns is as follows:

Provided you furnish us the requisite documentation (outlined in detail see: the Elporia Returns Policy) within a specified time period, we only accept returns for products that are damaged in transit.

Products that break – especially before the warranty is up – and need to be returned to the manufacturer – are dealt with on a case-by-case basis. However, as part of our customer service, we will help guide you through that process.

You can find the link to our Returns Policy in the Footer section of the webpage.

In addition, how we handle returns is listed in the Customer Information section, listed at the bottom of each product page.

After reading our Returns Policy, if you still have questions or concerns, don’t hesitate to contact us and we will be happy to answer your questions.

 

Refunds:

For your convenience, please note that a link to our Refunds Policy can be found in the Footer section of the Fapware.com website.

In addition, how we handle Returns and Refunds is automatically displayed in the Customer section of our product pages.

In a nutshell, this is how we handle refunds at Fapware.com:

To minimize the incidence of fraud or misrepresentation, we do not allow third parties to sell on our website.

For hygienic reasons,  opened packages (e.g., condoms, lubricants, etc.) and/or sex toys CAN NOT be returned

OTOH, if you never received the product you ordered or you received the product but it was broken/damaged in transit or it is not the product you ordered in the first place, we will issue a full refund, no questions asked.

Plus, to atone for the screw-up, not only will we replace the product – ASAP as in overnight shipping – but we will also give you a 50% off coupon that you can put toward your next purchase (a product that is of equal value) at Fapware.com.

What we will NOT do, provided you follow our instructions for submitting a claim, is tie you up in a lot of red tape or make you wait aeons to get your money returned.

 

Service:

Let’s be honest.

These days, competing with the big box stores and online behemoths is pretty damn hard, especially when it comes to price. So if you happen to be looking for bargains, discounted products, or lost leaders, you have come to the wrong place.

So how do we stay in business when the deck is stacked against us?

We do it by offering one-on-one personalized service.

We do it by providing hand-selected products.

We do it by preparing and collating product reviews that have eliminated the likes and me-too noise in favor of more nuanced views of the products we sell.

We do it by listening to our customers and giving them, to the best of our ability, what they want, when and how they want it. As for the whys-and-wherefores, it is none of g-d business, unless it is voluntarily offered and leads to continuous improvement.

We do it by rewarding loyalty; and last but not least,

We do it by staying in our lane, by not trying to be all things to all people. By not crossing the line. To that end, we only select products that facilitate solo sex or are fapping-related. Granted, it does get a bit fuzzy when it comes to non-solos but from what we can tell, based on the feedback we get, it is not uncommon for couples to engage in mutual masturbation as part of foreplay or remote sex when forced to be apart. Therefore, as a service to our customers, we accommodate their masturbatory needs.

In short, our service guarantee aims to delight you in a way the big boys can’t and never will, given their obsession with share-holder value, razor-thin margins and nickel-and-diming their employees.

That is not us, nor will it ever be.

 

Shipping & Handling:

Fapware.com offers free shipping and handling on orders $65 (USD) and over.

Unless you opt for expedited shipping, all of our products are shipped using the United States Postal Service.

Please note, we do ship sex toys outside the country, provided their are no legal restrictions that would prevent them from being imported into the host country.

 

 

Values:

Don’t know about you, but at Elporia.net, we are feeling pretty depressed these days. It seems like most everything we hold most dear† is coming apart at the seams.

With all of the lying, deep fakes, and misinformation being bandied about on the internet and our airwaves, you don’t know whom to trust anymore. The effects of climate change is taking it’s toll with extreme weather events becoming the new normal. By the sounds of it, COVID-19, plus the latest _fill_in_the_blank_ variant, is predicted to be the harbinger of new scourges that are biblical in nature. And don’t get us started on the 1% versus the 99 or the impact of AI, robotics and automation will have on wealth redistribution or the rise of white supremacy, authoritarianism and fascism, given all the evil impacts that implies. No telling what the unintended consequences will be.

From our vantage point, it seems we are moving into a period of transition where death, disaster and dislocation are the order of the day.

But it doesn’t have to be that way and that is where values come into play. Given the resilience of the human spirit, there is reason to be hopeful.

What do we, Elporia + Fapware + XXXotics, stand for?

To take a page out of the progressives’ handbook and let’s do as they are advocating, and build back better. If the world as we know it is being trashed before our very eyes, let’s not despair or bury out heads in the sand. Let’s use this opportunity to create a new society, a better society and a more forgiving society. One that is fairer, more equitable and less beholden to vested interests. One that is just. One that reconnects with nature and recognizes that we have a duty to preserve and protect.

Great. But where and how do we start?

From the bottom-up, one individual at a time until the groundswell cannot and will not be ignored by the powers that be. The time is now. We blow this opportunity, there won’t be another – at least, in our lifetime.

That’s why we are obsessed with pleasure. You have to get it when and where you can.

For who knows what tomorrow will bring,

Footnote

†We are aware that under-developed and poorer nations have been living this nightmare for some time.

Contact:

If you have a question or concern about any of these policies, please send us an email or write to use using our secure form:

Contact

and we will get back to you ASAP.

Due to the volume of email we get it might take us some time to get back to you, but we will. We personally read and carefully consider all the submissions that are sent to us.

Credits

The following modifications have been made: 1) filenames have been changed to conform to the Fapware.com naming convention, 2) icon colors have been modified; 3) file formats have been changed from .jpg/.png to .webp; and 4) some of the files have been cropped and resized.

Policy Icons: The Noun Project – Licensed Pro Version. URL: https://thenounproject.com/ .